I don't like to moan. In fact I don't even really want everyone knowing my business or feeling pity for me BUT if anything happened to me - people might say:" I'd have helped if I'd known!" There aint anything you can do so don't worry about it.
Wayne got drastically underpaid from work ( ie. we wont have enough to pay the rent, bills, internet blah blah) the company are wriggling out of it- it's like 'A Christmas Carol' 2015 - Travis Perkins playing the part of Scrooge. Feeling powerless and angry, and scared.
I was finally declared bankrupt yesterday- after the initial relief of not having to pay back £60k lost in the property crash of 2008/9 caused by Corporate Psychopaths -I realised I might not even be able to access my Tax credits or Housing benefit as my accounts may be frozen, and it being Christmas, there will be no-one available to help rectify this.
On the way back from court I was violently sick all over myself in the car 5 times, possibly due to attempting a Gregg's steak bake, the foul stench of Bristol City Centre, and Wayne's roll up. Luckily I managed to get most of it onto an old dog blanket. It was still an unpleasant journey. I was quite shaken.
I keep being sick now, I don't have a stomach due to my gastric bypass- so this is making me quite ill. I havent had enough vitamins. I'm so stressed out, and I cant even do anything about our impending financial doom - due to having to deal with Rowan's increasingly bizarre and defiant autistic /aspergers meltdowns- every time I try to make a phone call or email. ( More about the Autism diagnosis - and my experience of it next blog, sorry it's not in Chronological order--- I just haven't had he time or energy to write about it)
In January, It's my real danger zone for having nervous breakdowns, and Depression anyway- so this is looking like it's going to be a rough ride next month.
I guess I'm just putting this out there--so if I am carted off to the loony bin- you might at least say "Well, she did seem to have a lot on her plate, bless her!"
So what will January entail?
Well, It'll be fun watching Wayne on ITV's Ninja Warrior - he filmed it August. It'll be aired on January 2nd & 3rd. People will think he's amazing ( which he is) and assume that we are doing really well as a family ( ha!)
I'll attempt to sell everything I own , from fat clothes, and used knickers ( yes, it's a thing!) to kids toys, and non-essential electric items. It'll be tough to find time between the school run, begging trips to the Citizen's Advice Bureau and Council, SEN / Pediatrician/ GP / Physiotherapy / Occupational therapy sessions and school meetings for my son , but what other options do I have?
We can't claim any benefits. This is the life of a low income family in Britain today.
Fucking SHIT !
I'm a 43 year old, mum of two little boys- currently living in Shepton Mallet in Somerset. I'm the Founder and Creative Director of Radio Shepton, a Stand up and comedian and spoken word performer, and write a regular column for The Wells and Shepton Mallet Journal. Which is the basis for my blog usually. I lived in Swedish Lapland for 7 years until 2014 where my boys were born. My partner and I ran a husky dog sledding business. Before that I was a poet, radio presenter, media lecturer, writer, TV producer, actress and burlesque performer ! I never want my life to be boring :)